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  You are here:  AllExperts > Health/Fitness > Mental Health > Psychiatry & Psychology--General

Expert Profile: Melody Hartwell

Expertise:  I can answer questions about the subject of passive aggressiveness. Do you feel manipulated and frustrated by a date, a mate, a friend or relative? People often play the game of passive aggressiveness by withholding information that you want, and by "obstructionism." They communicate their angry feelings in subtle ways such as making you wait, withholding reassurance or affection, avoiding any fulfillment of your emotional needs, and many other kinds of obstinence and subterfuge. It can be completely frustrating and crazy making when you feel like you can't put your finger on what they are doing because they claim innocence so strongly. It's all about control. And pushing your buttons in order to satisfy their dysfunctional need to control your emotions.

Experience in the area
I have read so many books on this subject that I can spot it from far away. And most men have at least some of it, because men are not taught how to deal with their anger and so their anger must "go underground" in order to be accepted by society, however, it always peeks its head up in passive aggressiveness.

Publications
Many published articles and blogs. I wrote the forward to Mark Pendergrast's book, _Victims of Memory_. I have numerous mentions in books about memory by Elizabeth Loftus, Michael Yapko, Eleanor Goldstein and Kevin Farmer. I was featured in TIME magazine, PSYCHOLOGY TODAY, THE SAN FRANCISCO EXAMINER, among others publications. I appeared on Oprah with Professor Richard Ofshe.

Education/Credentials
College (psychology)

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What do you like about this subject?  This subject fascinates me, because people are always coming up with new kinds of subterfuge so that they can express their anger in socially appropriate ways. Customer Service people are often huge offenders in this field of dysfunctional social behavior.
What do you still hope to achieve/learn in this field?  I will continue to read books and professional articles on the subject, as it just fascinates me.
Something interesting about this subject that others may not know:  In the course of a day at work, you are 100% likely to run into some passive-aggressiveness from someone!
Something controversial or provocative about this subject  People who rely on this dysfunctional method of expressing their anger will deny it till the day they die. They loudly proclaim their innocence and you will usually have absolutely no luck getting them to admit their subterfuge. The innocence claims are a huge part of passive aggressive anger.
Average Ratings
Prestige Points: 200
Knowledge   9.60   Best of the best
Clarity of Response   10.0   Best of the best
Timeliness   10.0   Best of the best
Politeness   10.0   Best of the best
Number Of Questions
(in Past 24 Hours)
0
Max Questions to be Asked
(in 24 Hour period)
5
Total Questions
(since joining AllExperts)
34
Recent Reviews from Users
KnowlClarityTimePolitenessDate
10101007/22/08
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User Comments
Thank you so much. We will definately start at the doctor. I liked the idea of a log, helps to keep things in focus. Thanks!
(Colleen on 07/22/08)
THank you, you made it so easy for me to understand
(jackie on 06/26/08)
thanks for your timely help on this. Your answer rings true. He seems to do better if he can communicate with people that are not in position of autho
(Daniele on 06/23/08)
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Recent Answers from Melody Hartwell
2008-07-16  Mimickry That sounds like creepy stalking behavior and there is a movie about a girl doing that same exact thing. Read this: http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070815113437AAkAyYu I am not really...
2008-07-01  What is the real world like? This is really outside the scope of my expertise in passive-aggressive personality disorder, however I will say that it sounds like you are a very philosophical person and you have a curious mind, which...
2008-06-21  passive-agressive behavior at work That can be so frustrating. He probably is depressed. His stalling is passive aggressive and often depressed people act very passive aggressive. Is there any program at your workplace that gives you...
More Answers for "Psychiatry & Psychology--General"


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