Counseling/Expert Profile

Expertise

I can answer questions about mood disorders, depression, suicide, relationships, communication skills, problem solving, clear thinking, bonding disorders, trauma recovery, addiction management, grieving, shame, guilt, fear, reality distortion, and trust disorders; courtship, family functioning, "problem kids," mediation, (re)marriage, divorce, stepfamilies, stepparenting, boundaries, self-neglect, abuse, parental neglect, personality subselves, ("parts work"). I cannot answer legal or medical questions.

Experience in the area

I maintained a private therapy practice near Chicago for 27 years, and have worked with over 1,000 men, women, couples, and families on a wide range of personal and family problems. I have been in personal recovery from growing up in an alcoholic family since 1986, and have worked with five therapists to heal my own psychological wounds. I maintained a "warm (phone) line" for callers on the topics above for 20 years, and have taught over 200 seminars and classes in midwestern universities, churches, support groups, and schools since 1981. I have practiced internal-family therapy ("parts work") with trauma-recoverers since 1991.

Organizations

National Stepfamily Resource Center (NSRC) Experts Council; SelfGrowth.com Compassion and Choices, and Final Exit Network

Publications

# Several hundred articles in my non-profit "Break the Cycle!" Web site at http://sfhelp.org These articles are augmented by over 150 educational YouTube videos .

# six books on childhood-trauma recovery, effective communication, and stepfamily courtship, coparenting, and management.

Education/Credentials

A bachelors degree in mechanical engineering (BSME, 1959) from Stanford University, a Masters degree in clinical Social Work, (MSW, 1981), and over 500 hours of post-grad training in the topics above - including clinical hypnosis, spirituality, codependence, addicrtion-management, and guided imagery. My post-grad traning includes two 9-month internships on doing internal-family therapy at the University of Illinois.

Awards and Honors

Hundreds of grateful emails and comments from students and clients all over the world.

Past/Present Clients

Over 1,000 average Midwestern-US women, men, couples, and families. A physical disability limits me to doing telephone and Skype counseling now.

What do you like about this subject?

I get great satisafaction from helping troubled people (a) idfentify what the need, and (b) discovering practical options to fill those needs. I like promoting people's ability to solve their own problems effectively, and aim to "put myself out of business" with them as fast as possible.

What do you still hope to achieve/learn in this field?

To (1) alert as many people as possible to the causes, symptoms, and effects of the toxic {psychological wounds + unawareness] cycle, and (2) help as many people as possible learn how to spot and reduce their inherited wounds - specially people nurturing young kids.

Something interesting about this subject that others may not know:

That what people think they need for "happiness" is often a *symptom* of what thjey REALLY need, but are unaware of. Another interesting thing is how about 80% of average people who learn the concept of normal personality subselves say (in a poll) "Yes, subselves are real without question."

Something controversial or provocative about this subject

After 32 years' research and experience, I propose that most or ALL typical personal, family, social, and national "problems" result from two preventable factors that are silently passing down and weakening our generations: (1) unseen psychological wounds from childhood + (2) unawareness of up to seven core topics.