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  You are here:  AllExperts > Parenting/Family > Step-Parenting > Parenting Stepchildren

Expert Profile: J.L. Slipak

Expertise:  Over the last 19 years, I have been researching the issue of stepparenting/stepchildren and living life as a blended family. I have 4 stepchildren. I am available to answer any questions regarding parenting a stepchild/stepchildren and will base my answers using my own personal experience with 4 of my own. I'm an advocate for children with special needs and have worked in the legal area of Family Law and Civil Law for 7 years. I'm a published writer of this subject. I have dealt with many issues including: dealing with the biological parent, eating disorders, relationships between siblings, education, access, etc. I can offer support, personal opinions and resources based on research I've used while writing about these subjects. Don't ask me any questions that you have the answers for already. Make sure you include all information pertaining to the question at hand, as I base my answers on what you've sent me. Remember, this is just my opinion and nothing else. I wish all stepparents great success with their perspective lives. Remember it takes a lot to step in when others have stepped out.

Education/Credentials
BFA, working towards my Masters. Stepparent of 4 stepchildren.Bioparent of two, all inclusive of two special needs children: one down syndrome; the other ODD/ADD.

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What do you still hope to achieve/learn in this field?  I would like to open the door to the legal rights of stepparents more. I would also like to make people more aware of what it takes to be a stepparent and for people to think more about taking the plunge as being a stepparent before actually becoming one. Love is grand, but stepparenting is a long road to self-discovery.
Something interesting about this subject that others may not know:  If we were to gather together in a pail, all the things that would make stepparenting easier, the largest item in our pail would be understanding, but the biggest would be unconditional love... from both stepparents and stepchildren... Stepparents are not just financial means to making single bioparents' lives easier, we are people too...
Something controversial or provocative about this subject  "...we are expected to raise, support,nurture and care for our stepchildren, yet laws and bios do not allow us the rights of a parent... should we not then be considered "caregivers" and be paid for our services? ... perhaps instead of fighting us, bioparents should work with us in raising their children... because reality dictates that we are a blended society, and stepparents are inevitable."
What do you like about this subject?  There is no "perfect" family in existance.

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Recent Answers from J.L. Slipak
2008-08-28  Stepchildren Hello Dnique, I would recommend counseling for you. You have an 8 month old son. You could be suffering from post-partum depression sometimes associated with child birth. Visit your doctor and ask about...
2008-08-28  Out of control step kids Hello Lupe, You cannot do this on your own. You need to put these kids in counseling and youth programs to help them and yourself. You need to get involved with every aspect of their lives. I hope a...
2008-08-27  Aggrevated!! Hello Dawn, I can imagine the pressure your husband felt knowing this was the first visit after 3-1/2 years and he wanted it to go perfectly. Several factors probably were involved in creating the stress...
2008-08-27  Trouble with my 14 year old step son Hello again, I would stress to his mother that the lad should be in the room with the counselor alone, without interference from the adults. He needs to feel that he can open up without being punished...
2008-08-27  Step Family Trouble! Hello Erica, I will never understand why bioparents rush into relationships so quickly after divorce. There are leftover issues that your bf and his children and his ex have to work out. This does not...
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