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Robert Rubel (Dr. Bob)

U.S.
Available
Expertise

Anything related to BDSM or Master/slave relationships or activities.

Experience in the area

See: www.KinkMastery.com I live 24/7 Master/slave lifestyle and have since 2002 both as Master and slave. My Owner and I present and do "weekend intensives" internationally and at BDSM conferences practically every month.

Organizations

Masters And slaves Together (MAsT) National Leather Association - International (NLA-I) National Coalition for Sexual Freedom (NCSF)

Publications

+++ BDSM Mastery—Basics: your guide to play, parties, and scene protocols. +++ BDSM Mastery—Relationships: a guide for creating mindful relationships for Dominants and submissives +++ Master/slave Mastery: Updated handbook of concepts, approaches, and practices +++ Master/slave Mastery--Advanced: Refining the fire; ideas that matter +++ Master/slave Mastery--Protocols: Focusing the intent of your relationship +++ Is THAT What They Meant? A book of practical communication insights

Education/Credentials

PhD, Urban Education Policy Studies with a minor in criminology, U of Wisconsin, Madison. EdM, Boston University with specialty in urban education Presented 80+ BDSM weekend conferences worldwide since 2007.

Awards and Honors

Pantheon of Leather Community Choice - Man, 2008

Past/Present Clients

Not applicable.

What do you like about this subject?

The M/s structure enables a couple to grow in many ways: in spirituality, in knowledge, and in wisdom. By focusing on our mutually-agreed goals, the couple can move as one. This has not been my experience in my marriages (17 and 14 years). The fact that the slave is committed to serving and obeying makes a profound difference.

What do you still hope to achieve/learn in this field?

Ah, one never stops learning until you're dead. I view my writings (and activities such as volunteering on this site) as a way of giving back to the community of kinksters and Leatherfolk.

Something interesting about this subject that others may not know:

The fantasy view of a Master/slave structure is that the slave's sole purpose is to serve Master. While largely true, many miss the point that the Master is in service to the relationship. Master's primary responsibility is to the total wellbeing of the slave(s). This takes serious and ongoing planning and work. Much harder than the average marriage.

Something controversial or provocative about this subject

I distinguish between the "Leather" approach to Master/slave versus the BDSM approach to Master/slave.

Average Ratings

Recent Reviews from Users

Read More Comments

    K = Knowledgeability    C = Clarity of Response    P = Politeness
UserDateKCPComments
Daniel08/08/1610 
james07/05/16101010ok, thank you very much!!
Jillian05/24/16101010 
Bellum03/05/161010Milles mercis à vous cher Docteur ! .....
Marc01/29/16101010Thank you very much for the quick .....

Recent Answers from Robert Rubel (Dr. Bob)

2017-02-17 masochist male:

Are you a member of Fetlife.com?  If not, that would be a start. In the search field, put in the name of your city. I did that, and have found pages and pages of members. It should not be too difficult

2016-08-08 Newbie Master:

Hi, Daniel --    An exciting new experience, to be sure.    Well... I'd suggest you start with a book called: "Master/slave Mastery: Updated handbook of theory and practice." That will give you the theory

2016-07-19 How to move on...:

Hi, Elisha...    VERY sorry to hear of this progression.      It sounds to me as though you both had a great connection in the beginning, but as the "three-month crazies" (as Jay Wiseman calls them) wore

2016-07-03 advice on new sub:

Hi, James...    Thanks for writing.  You might suggest that your friend consider reading two books that my partner and I have written for people with zero to one year of BDSM experience and want to learn

2016-05-24 PDA:

Hi, Jillian, thanks for writing.    Sure...    Walk slightly behind him, either on his right or left side.  Open doors for him. HE will walk ahead of you into restaurants. If you want to push it some,

 

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