BDSM/Expert Profile

Expertise

Master/slave theory and practice, using protocols to make your world special, communication glitches within the M/s framework, serious problem solving in an M/s relationship, fire play.

Experience in the area

Author of: Master/slave Relations: Handbook of Theory and Practice; Protocol Handbook for the Female slave (The gender-free version is titled: Protocol Handbook for the Leather slave. They are essentially the same.) M/s Relations: Communications 401 - the Advanced Course; M/s Relations: Solutions 402 -- Living in Harmony There are other books, but only these are relevant to this category. ... and a few others. By the way, my slave is on the far left, and my Owner is in the middle. We've been together over six years, and have lived as a Leather Family since June, 2006.

Organizations

MAsT, NLA-I

Publications

See my website: www.RubelPresents.com and go to the "publications" tab.

Education/Credentials

PhD, Urban Education Policy Studies with a minor in criminology, U of Wisconsin, Madison. Have presented over 30 times in 2007 and 2008 at major weekend Leather and BDSM conferences. These are all listed on my website, www.RubelPresents.com along with all my presentation topics.

Awards and Honors

Pantheon of Leather Community Choice - Man, 2008

Past/Present Clients

I am currently mentoring two people, listed on my FetLife profile of Dr_Bob. I particularly enjoy mentoring FemDommes -- they often listen better. I have successfully transformed a select number of people. It's not a question of what I offer, it's a question of what you bring to the table.

What do you like about this subject?

The M/s structure enables me to direct my slave so the two of us can grow spiritually, in knowledge, and in wisdom. By focusing my slave's efforts on our mutually-agreed goals, we can move as one. This was not my experience in my marriages (17 and 14 years). The fact that the slave is committed to serving and obeying makes a profound difference.

What do you still hope to achieve/learn in this field?

Ah, you never stop learning until you're dead. I view my writings (and activities such as volunteering on this site) as a way of giving back to the community of kinksters and Leatherfolk.

Something interesting about this subject that others may not know:

The fantasy view of a Master/slave structure is that the slave's sole purpose is to serve Master. While true, they miss the point that the Master is also a servant. Master's primary responsibility is to the total wellbeing of the slave(s). This takes serious and ongoing planning and work. Much harder than marriage.

Something controversial or provocative about this subject

I firmly separate Leather Master/slave practices from the way most people in the general BDSM world view and practice their Master/slave relationships. Often, the way these relationships form are quite different, the presence and use of contracts is quite different, and the outlook about how you're using the structure is quite different. Uhhh -- I'm fairly outspoken on these points.